Thursday, February 27, 2014

THAT girl.

....once upon a time.
THAT girl.
had it all figured out.

that girl.
woke up every day with clear direction.
sure thoughts.
and everything simply “fell into place”.
'cause that girl MADE it seem that way. 
she was the "sure" thing.
the constant. 
the strength.
that girl.
you have known her.
been her?

sure strength.
sure love.
sure beauty.
of anything. and everything. 
{of her illusion}

SHE pushed through what needed pushing through.
with a smile.
...and the sweetness of the sweetest. 
that girl always did what needed to be done.
no. matter. what.
{self compromising by the minute.}

... all was well and right in her world.
that girl knew exactly what it took.
and she did it. 
what else is she to do? 
she is THAT girl, after all.

THAT. girl.
is a mama.
a friend.
a wife. 
a employee/employer.
a woman.
to everyone.
she is simply a girl.
just keepin' on.
keepin' on.
not to be underestimated.
{not for a second}

THAT girl.
{perfection at its least – and best – go figure.}

so what if...
isn't exactly THAT girl anymore?

what if.
fades to imperfection.
and clear direction becomes swayed.
what if.
everything that used to fall gracefully into place.
simply crashes?
what if.
everything changes?
SHE changes. 
a little here. a little there.
and VOILA.

suddenly - who's THAT GIRL!?!?!

SHE is.
she IS.
THAT girl.
but different. 

love her if you want to.
or don't.
she isn't all that concerned. 
'cause now...she has 
flaws and imperfections.
that make her real.
wants and needs.
that are evident and straight forward.
that doesn't apologize.
 crazy and lack of crazy.
simply because she knows her boundaries.
you should explore her mind and her heart. 
'cause you can. 
'cause she MIGHT just let you.
 she is not sure about one damn thing.
and won't pretend to be.
 honor her strength,  adore her weakness.
she cares ABOUT you not WHAT you think. 

SHE simply IS.
she has NOTHING figured out with certainty.
but EVERYTHING resides in hope.
and she prefers it that way..... 
she is beautifully confused.
gorgeous chaos.
IN it.

it's a THAT girl thing.
get it. or don't. 
been there  - or haven’t.
admit it or not.

THIS girl is good either way.

Thursday, January 2, 2014

sometimes....we love. without loving.

life has this way of throwing us off.
a little bit.
ya know?

suddenly everything that made sense...
makes no sense.

our souls are so strong.
yet maybe a little lost.
they are SOULS for goodness sake.
NOTHING is going to break them, yet EVERYTHING is going to challenge them.
that is the purpose, right.

they are persevere-ant.
but at the same time.
still searching.
always -
for what exactly it is....
that makes them stir.

it takes a lifetime to understand.

i think.
we are MEANT to feel.
in this moment.
in order to get to where we are going.

so every time someone or something....
pay attention.
everything matters.
on some level or another.

soak it in - or let it go.
your choice.

Monday, December 23, 2013

GET out of your HEAD. i dare ya.

funny thing.
someone just gave me a piece of advice i have needed for a VERY LONG time.

"YOU need to get out of YOUR OWN HEAD"

truth. so MUCH TRUTH.

it is EXACTLY my problem.
i am so relieved!!!!!
someone finally had the guts to shoot it to me straight!

it's what i have done always.

i take a thought to entertain - create a monster - and beat the shit out of it.
...and then just when i think i have won.
sucker comes alive again.
and i just sit and stare like, REALLY?!
then we go around and around again.

most of the time...eventually - i win, but why the stinkin' battle in the first place?
what is the point?
why even go around and around about it.
JUST. let it GO! - crazy.

time spent battling your thoughts is time wasted.
completely wasted.
an internal battle that just puts little stab marks into your heart.
that aren't even necessary.

what was, WAS.
what is, IS.
what will be, WILL BE.
so live.
enjoy the moment.
...and take it as it comes.

GET out of your head.
best advice ever.
taking it to heart.
deep breath.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

full circle moment.


we just want to 
at the 
everything about ANYTHING
 that we have ever endured.

every thought we have entertained. 
every emotion we have felt.
{and still feel} 
every wrong we have experienced -  and right we have decided...
not to mention every. single. moment.  our little souls have endured - 
regardless of right or wrong.
'cause it was necessary at the moment.

we "stuff" it all away.
like it never happened. 
we look away.
'cause ignoring is the only thing that saves us, temporarily.
we move forward, and try to forget....
however. that moment of truth comes around.
every. single. time.

eventually, as much as you fight it -  feelings just start to emerge.
...and even maybe START TO make sense.
THE BIG PICTURE becomes just a little more clear.
 ALL the stories connect. 
and MUCH TO YOUR SURPRISE - they are more in depth and entwined - than you could have EVER imagined.
'cause you had a tiny "whisper" to open up.
your story no longer is JUST YOURS.
kinda scary.
till you realize,
we are connected. 
by love. 
by similarities. 
by admiration. and understanding.
by what is to come, and by what has been.

so what is my point?

here you go.

let your love be driven by whispers.
let your similarities be vulnerable.
let your admiration run free...and your understanding be limitless....

and let what is to come be THAT MUCH SWEETER because of what HAS been.

do you really think you have come this far by chance?
YOU have come this far by PURPOSE.
own it.
embrace it.
use it.
'cause it is all yours for the taking.
there is NOTHING SWEETER in life than a full circle moment...
and the realization that it has arrived.


Monday, October 1, 2012

how big are your BOOTS?!

life wears BIG BOOTS.
i swear they are potentially size 26.
{that is big}
they fit snug and secure and know EXACTLY how to STOMP.
 RIGHT on top of your head....
or maybe even 
RIGHT IN FRONT of you so you fall into this abyss of a "boot print".

but I KNOW 
but you can relate.

you are just flawlessly meandering along.
and then WHAM.
without warning....everything FALLS APART.
case and point. 

 you dig or climb your way out of the "HOLE" you had NO IDEA was coming....
it seems so completely foreign...
impossible to overcome. and just plain unfair. 

what you need to know is that WHILE you are being stomped on....
when things come at you from NO-WHERE - and take you DOWN
YOU are also leaving YOUR MARK.

YOU have BOOTS of your own, baby.
your integrity.
your persistence.
your endurance.
your love.
your wit.
i promise.

lace em' up.
pull them on.

and don't let life get you down.
you are here to...
higher and higher...
and emerge.
consistently and persistently.

BIGGER than you have EVER BEEN.

YOU choose your "BOOTS"
fill em' up.
with style.
all your own.
make YOUR mark.
life belongs to YOU.
bigger than ever.
forget the prints others think they can leave.
make your own.
THOSE are the ones that matter.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

- it is one of my favorites. ♥

there are no accidents....

IIF it's appeared on your life radar, this is why: to teach you that DREAMS come true; to reveal that you have the power to FIX what's BROKEN and HEAL what HURTS; to catapult you beyond seeing with just your physical senses; and to lift the veils that have kept you from seeing that you're already the person you dreamed you'd become. ♥

...and believe me, that was one heck of a dream.

{my goodness i love this.}

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

nothing wonderful in particular.

i could not have said it better myself {thanks, andy}

For most of life, nothing wonderful happens.

If you don’t enjoy getting up and working and finishing your work and sitting down to a meal with family or friends, then the chances are that you’re not going to be very happy.

If someone bases his happiness or unhappiness on major events like a great new job, huge amounts of money, a flawlessly happy marriage or a trip to Paris, that person isn’t going to be happy much of the time.

If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness.
Andy Rooney